[from the look on her face, it seems like she's about to say something harsh, but - she pulls herself back from it. this wasn't his fault, she knows, even if she's feeling a little unfair at the moment.]
I won't put a burden on you if you don't want it but... he cares very much for you...
[ he shakes his head ]
See him whole. If he ends up with me tomorrow... I won't let him do anything that ends in his demise. I won't allow it. It'll only be me that leaves. I will do whatever it takes.
It chose me... but I must carry whatever it put on my shoulders. This... thing. [ he looks to her ] Treat the others the same. I know what this is like, I've known the feel of claws in your back, teeth in your neck telling you what to do, steering you where to go. This?
[ his voice is quiet: ] I will be okay... These are just old wounds.
[she nods, after a moment. normally she wouldn't press about something that's this clearly painful for him, but... she needs to know.]
Yes. You said it was like... something sinking its fangs into you? I know that was a turn of phrase, but - did it feel like there was another entity actually controlling you, or compelling you?
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...We'll see what happens tomorrow, I guess.
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[ he looks downward. ]
I won't put a burden on you if you don't want it but... he cares very much for you...
[ he shakes his head ]
See him whole. If he ends up with me tomorrow... I won't let him do anything that ends in his demise. I won't allow it. It'll only be me that leaves. I will do whatever it takes.
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I would have done that even if you didn't ask.
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[ softly. a smile. soft. faint. far off. he squeezes his eyes shut, tightly like there's an ache in his head. ]
I'm sorry I couldn't be a better person.
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...You didn't choose this, either.
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It chose me... but I must carry whatever it put on my shoulders. This... thing. [ he looks to her ] Treat the others the same. I know what this is like, I've known the feel of claws in your back, teeth in your neck telling you what to do, steering you where to go. This?
[ his voice is quiet: ] I will be okay... These are just old wounds.
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[ he swallows ]
Ask, and I'll do my [ he curls his fingers tightly into his palm, a wave of something crests over him and he rides it quietly. ] --best.
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Yes. You said it was like... something sinking its fangs into you? I know that was a turn of phrase, but - did it feel like there was another entity actually controlling you, or compelling you?